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Family Code

By March 3, 2019No Comments

Family Code


  • Rough draft first
  • List the non-negotiables in your home (respect, dinner time, etc)
  • Write each statement in positives (“We will treat each other respectfully using a tone that sounds respectful”)
  • List up to 5 non-negotiables
  • Next list what positive rewards that will occur naturally from following these guidelines (ie., you’ll be rewarded with 30 minutes extra screen time daily)
  • Create the Consequence List for these not being followed
  • This consequence list needs to communicate clear consequences (ie., your electronic devices will be removed for 2 days)
  • Decorate to appeal to the eye
  • Frame
  • Share with family in family meeting
  • Allow feedback and suggestions and revise if appropriate
  • Place/hang in well viewed area of home (ie. by dinner table)


  • Use only ‘do not’ language
  • List more than 5 non-negotiables
  • Forget to list positive rewards
  • List only consequences
  • Create ‘blurry’ consequences (ie you’ll lose time on your device)
  • Forget to share and ask for feedback from the family
  • Not follow through with either the positives or the negative consequences

Kathleen Hassenfratz, LPC

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